Wanna love again??

The question is I guess...I wanna love again...2day I feel sad, irritated, kina hurt, My husband of....10yrz this December this morning tries to kiss me b-4 wrk but I feel no emotions. We are having crazy problems I mean neverending marrige problems and We are most likely to seperate soon but I feel like im the bad guy well that's the way he makes me feel....ahhh I wanna run but I have lil ones......We married in 1996 Im 24 now...U do the math, And whn I see a couple in love and I realy wish I can be that way again b-4 im 30 u kno I mean I've spent all of my life being in total controll by either my crazy dad then my husban took over once we got together, I've tried to have a better relationship with him but not only does he continue to control my every move but I can't love him anymore...there's too much hurt I want to be happy...But not by his side..............Thnx guys for reading my sad feelingz........rOXY**